I mentioned in a previous post that Kami collected tons of quotes. I don't remember how old she was when she started collecting them but it was in her early teens. She had a white board in her room and she was constantly putting new quotes on it. I have really enjoyed reading through her book of quotes. She had so many different quotes about so many different areas of her life. I noticed as I read through the quotes, there are a lot of quotes about falling in love, finding peace in life, friendship, equality, and unity among other topics. I would love to share all of them but I have included just a few with the link below. Bud was given a book by his sister when Kami died, it is called An Angel in the Clouds. It is about a young man that suffered from OCD and depression for most of his life and finally at the age of 27 took his own life. What I found interesting is that he liked to collect quotes also. He kept them on note cards. It makes me wonder if this is a coping mechanism for people who suffer from depression. Just a thought. I have no idea but I find it interesting that this young man kept quotes also.
A few days before Kami died I injured my back. I am not sure how, but I was moving some furniture and I must have injured it then. Later that night I woke up with shooting pain in my left leg and I have been up pretty much every night since then. The physical pain wakes me up and then I lay there and think and have a terrible time getting back to sleep. It has really made me think about the mental pain that Kami had been going through and for how long was it unbearable. How many nights did she lay awake trying to figure out how to make the pain stop and how to find some peace. Where could she feel safe.
I am going to share a couple of quotes that stood out for me for one reason or another:
"If I had my life to live over, I would make the same mistakes, only sooner"
A few days before Kami died I injured my back. I am not sure how, but I was moving some furniture and I must have injured it then. Later that night I woke up with shooting pain in my left leg and I have been up pretty much every night since then. The physical pain wakes me up and then I lay there and think and have a terrible time getting back to sleep. It has really made me think about the mental pain that Kami had been going through and for how long was it unbearable. How many nights did she lay awake trying to figure out how to make the pain stop and how to find some peace. Where could she feel safe.
I am going to share a couple of quotes that stood out for me for one reason or another:
"If I had my life to live over, I would make the same mistakes, only sooner"
“For the
first time you can open your eyes, See the
world without your sorrow, No one
knows the pain you’ve left behind, All the
peace you could never find is waiting there."
I had a good friend pass away early this morning. She has been sick for a little while and she was in a lot of pain. The last time I talked to her, she told me that she would tell Kami that I loved and missed her when she got to the other side. Then she said, "then I'm going to beat the *&^% out of her!!" I am so glad that she is there with Kami and I am sure they have seen each other. I hold on to the hope that she was able to tell her how much I miss her and love her.
Another thing I found interesting is how much her handwriting changes towards the end. I know this sounds funny but her writing looks sad and kind of angry. Anyone that has received a letter from Kami over the years, she always ended it with a quote. This is what I am going to do with this post.
(Below is the one I have printed out and have on my monitor at work)
“You can shed tears that they are gone,Or you can smile
because they have lived. You can close your eyes
and pray they will Come back, or you can open your eyes
and see all they’ve left. Your heart can be empty because you
Can’t see them, or you can be full of The love you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday, or you
can be happy For tomorrow because of yesterday. You can
remember them only that they are gone, or you can cherish their
memory and let it live on. You can cry and close your mind, be
empty and turn your back, or you can do what they would have wanted,
smile, Open your eyes and go on.”
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