One of my very favorite articles she wrote is about mother's of special needs children. Because I had a Grandma that I hold in the highest regard, that was blessed to be the mom of my Aunt Janilee. Erma stated that if you went into a room full of mothers, you would be able to pick out these "special moms". I agree. My Grandma Rowley was a special lady.
The Special Mother by Erma Bombeck
This year nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children. Did you ever wonder how mothers of handicapped children are chosen? Somehow I visualize God hovering over earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As He observes, He instructs His angels to make notes in a giant ledger.
"Armstrong, Beth; son. Patron saint...give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."
"Forrest, Marjorie; daughter. Patron saint, Cecelia."
"Rutledge, Carrie; twins. Patron saint, Matthew."
Finally He passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a handicapped child."
The angel is curious. "Why this one God? She's so happy."
"Exactly," smiles God, "Could I give a handicapped child to a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel."
"But has she patience?" asks the angel.
"I don't want her to have too much patience or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wears off, she'll handle it."
"I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence that is so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I'm going to give her has his own world. She has to make him live in her world and that's not going to be easy."
"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."
God smiles, "No matter, I can fix that. This one is perfect -she has just enough selfishness."
The angel gasps - "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"
God nods, "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she'll never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect.
She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a "spoken word".
She will never consider a "step" ordinary.
When her child says "Mummy" for the first time, she will be present at a miracle, and will know it!"
"I will permit her to see clearly the things I see...ignorance, cruelty, prejudice....and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life, because she is doing My Work as surely as if she is here by my side".
"And what about her Patron saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in mid-air. God smiles, "A mirror will suffice.
I also believe that if you had a room full of mom's that had lost a child in with those that have not, you would be able to pick us out. We are the one's that seem to be functioning on a daily basis but we are missing a piece of our heart. We have a constant ache in our hearts. Those of us who have lost a child to suicide are the one's that have an extra layer of guilt because we couldn't "save" our child. I compare my life to this now: recently I was putting together a puzzle with my grand kids, and we got down to the last piece, we could not find it. We looked everywhere, under the couch, in the cushions, in the box, we were distraught. We were so close to being done. It just didn't look right without that piece. Finally after several minutes of searching, we found it underneath something. We completed the puzzle and all was great. Mother's who have lost a child, can't have that complete puzzle. We are always searching for reminders of our child. We want to remember their voice, the sparkle in their eye, the smile that we loved to see. That piece of our child and our lives will forever be missing until we pass from this life and can see them again. For now though, my puzzle is missing a piece.
